The Blog in the High Castle

Dear Reichminister of Public Works [Insert Name Here]: I'm sorry I left the salutation blank, but the Trumpenfuhrer seems to go through you guys like Bill Clinton went through bimbos, and I didn't want to be shot for addressing a just-recently-declared traitor. Anyway, I am a 31-year-old construction worker who was proud to have built the Great Southern Wall using the bones of the Trumpenfuhrer's vanquished enemies. I'm wondering when we'll build another one on the northern border - I need the work, the Trumpenfuhrer hasn't run out of enemies, and everyone knows those damn tree-tappers are up to something. Dear Peon Who Clearly Doesn't Own the November 2019 Edition of Who's Who In The Trumpenreich: I, your supreme Trumpenfuhrer, have been forwarded this letter. I have enclosed with my reply a copy of the November 2019 Edition of Who's Who In The Trumpenreich. Since the penalty for not being up-to-date on the current Reichministers is death, I had t...

It was a problem vexing the Trumpenreich's top minds for months. As the Trumpenfuhrer Himself put it, "Our flag is so perfect, with fifty stars. So we can't add new states. But we have to expand our territory, because we need breathing room and they're not sending their best." A stopgap measure was found last year, when the Insurrectionist Wasteland of California was stripped of "state" status, and its statehood given to Greenland instead. The Trumpenfuhrer personally approved this move, stating that Greenland "is much safer, much cleaner, much greater." But obviously this method could not continue indefinitely, and so earlier this year the Trumpenfuhrer announced two retroactive Expansion Spheres. Mexico and Canada form the first, and are now fully absorbed into the Trumpenreich. Afghanistan, Iran, and Iraq were the second, and though unenlightened souls continue to resist, their client status is all but assured. Today Reichminister of P...

(as a reminder, these are dispatches from the alternate-universe hellscape where Trump is the dictator you all think he is) Once upon a time, the United States had pussy presidents who would ring in the new year by pardoning obviously guilty turkeys or giving speeches. That dark age has ended. We are now, of course, the Greater Trumpenproletariat, and our glorious Trumpenfuhrer is no pussy president. As loyal servants of the Trumpenreich know, the arch-traitors of the Democratic Party have been spearheading attacks on Our Democracy for years now. We are pleased to report that earlier this year, the Trumpenfuhrer had several of these prominent Democrats terminated via drone strike, while they were waiting for their Uber at Washington-Dulles Airport. Surviving Democrat Alexandria Occasional-Cortex issued a statement from her bed at St. Albert's Hospital for the Criminally Insane, accusing the Trumpenfuhrer of committing "war crimes." Representatives of the Trumpenfuhr...