It has come to our attention that there exists a blog calling itself The Grasshopper Lies Heavy . This blog purports to show an alternate timeline , with incredibly disturbing developments. The point of divergence appears to be that in this hellish alternate reality, the U.S. never invaded Iraq. Barack Obama remained an obscure back-bencher, unable to use his opposition to a war that launched before he arrived in the Senate to strike a contrast with She-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. As a result, She-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named won the 2008 election, and was roundly defeated by Mitt Romney in 2012. Grasshopper purports to show a reality where President Romney, now on his second term, and a cadre of globalist scum, have taken over the world, and EU is ravaged not by hordes of Islamic invaders but by the wages of communism. Reichminister of Public Indoctrination Betsy DeVos has issued a statement condemning the work as dangerous and subversive. Reichminister of Public Safety Jeff Sessions has issu...
DC- The Trumpenfuhrer laid out his grand vision for his war against Science. "I will not rest until the scourge of Science has been driven from the fatherland," he declared. "Its cities will be razed, its men shot, its women and children enslaved." Reichminister of State Rexxon von Tillerson announced that the Science embassy has been closed and all of its personnel imprisoned for crimes against the state. In addition, the Trumpenfuhrer made a stunning display of bipartisan outreach in naming Certified Minorities Shaun King and Elizabeth Warren, as well as Certified Women Bruce Jenner and Bradley Manning, his top generals in the War on Science. Already several nuclear missiles, ironically designed and built by Science itself, have been launched at Science's major cities and industrial centers. It is expected that the War on Science could take several years, but the Trumpenfuhrer said not to worry about that, because at the conclusion of the war we will no ...
Greetings and saluti, comrades. Am reports big goings-on in glorious People's Republic of Kakistan to-day. Economic forensics laboring gloriously under El Presidente's supreme leadership have detected what is referring to " structural abnormalities " in glorious People's Republic economy. El Presidente's economists have assured us that ordinary people THE HARD-WORKING PROLETARIAT, THE TRUE HEROES OF GLORIOUS KAKISTAN cannot detect these structural abnormalities and will not affecting by them. Adding that it would be "unfair and absurd" to expect the rich, upon whom this burden rightfully belongs, to pass it on to the serf underclass HEROIC PIONEERS OF SOCIALIST LABOR . Although economy is suffering from inflation CALMLY WEATHERING THE STORM OF STRUCTURAL ABNORMALITIES this is still far too complex a situation for meager capitalist running dogs to handle. Having been alerted to the backlogs of cargo ships in and outside Kakistani ports, El Pre...
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